Today was slow. It started off relatively well, as most two-hour delays do, then progressively became more sluggish as the day trucked on. First block, however was the exception to this snail of a day. Three of my classmates presented their final projects in our English class and I was thoroughly impressed. Even though there has been past tension with some of them, I'm really glad that I was able to share not only the educational but the personal experience with these really great people. The rest of the day kind of merged together: retook a Chemistry test, helped identify muscles in mink dissections, endured yet another brutal Spanish class, and came home to a grumpy baby brother. Deciding to blog a little earlier than usual was the only logical move after a day like that, but as I sat down to write, I found that I didn't have much to blog about. I mean, I could have listed the problems off of my Chem test, or described the gooey fat that the A&P students had to remove from the minks (yeah, that was pretty gross, sorry for the lack of a disclaimer!), but I found those two topics to be rather bland. I could have gone into detail about the pronunciation of this ridiculously hard word or just how sassy the terrible two-year old was being but these ideas seemed to hit a dead end fast. So I sat. Actually, I watched The Social Network, which I found fascinating. This Regular Joe kid, well okay not necessarily Regular Joe, he was a Harvard wiz kid after all, came up with one of the biggest and most technologically linking ideas of the century. Facebook is everywhere; in the way we talk, the way we think, and at least for me, the best way to waste hours of time. It was so crazy to see how in just two weeks Mark Zuckerman engineered the idea and made it come to life. That's when it hit me. Fear. Fear of not knowing and fear of failure. Mark Zuckerman created this social network, what do I have to show? Constantly putting off homework and applications and essays, it's all because of fear. Putting your future, and essentially your life into someone else's hands is the hardest thing I've had to do thus far in my life, yet the most exhilarating. Even though there is a chance that I can get in, or a chance that someone will like what I have to say I'm still afraid. Afraid of the rejection, afraid of the denial, afraid of the judgement. I know who I am, and I know what I can do. I'm just as capable as anyone else out there, and yet there is still this tendency to shrink back and let others do the shining. Well, not anymore. At least not tonight. Cheers to doing the best, wanting the best, being the best. Tonight I'm going to be number one. And tomorrow? Who knows. Cross your fingers for me.
"Have no fear of perfection- you'll never reach it." -Salvador Dali
live simply.
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